Oh Me of Little Faith

Reading back through my posts so far, it strikes me that God has not given me the peace he has for me. And that may be my fault. I like everything fast and stimulating. It keeps the fear away. Fears of doom, perhaps. Fear of something I can't even name. Maybe I'm just running from letting go of myself. Running with myself away from humility.

I like my Bible and Bible study fast and stimulating too. I'd like to drink Red Bull and study the Bible. Mental activity. I am impatient for the next good thing. That seems like some form of possession. Possessed by an insecure need for worldly gratification that alleviates my fear that I am imminently doomed.

What it really comes down to is whether I believe the Bible is true. Do I believe Jesus? Do I really believe in heaven? My priorities don't demonstrate that I do. My priorities say it's all up to me. I'm not sure what is blocking me from the next step in faith.

Godly Internet Marketing

Even though I know lots about various forms of Internet Marketing, including SEO, I think I'm going to just let God promote this blog.

If it's His will that people read it, they will. I'll pray and leave that up to him.

If you've ever read George Mueller's Autobiography, you know that Faith can affect the World. God does act here.

Vis a vis my post on the ultimate futility of worldly strategy, I think I'd rather just let God's Spirit determine where this blog goes and who reads it.

:-)

The Prodigal Son Cycle I Keep Repeating Endlessly

Coming back to brokenness and the Word, the insight I find is that I keep repeating this stupid cycle. Can I ever break free of it?

See how when we are broken and humbled, we go to Prayer, which gives us Faith and Joy?

But the danger of that Joy is that we start to take credit for the Joy and the Blessings God has given us.

"If I can make THAT happen, what ELSE can I make happen???"

So we dream bigger dreams of greater selfish glories, greater achievements, greater blessings, and we begin to plan HOW we will make that happen, but we have already started with lust and selfishness, so chances are that our methods will be sinful and have Consequence.

As soon as we experience Consequence again, we are humbled and go back to God.

What a waste of time! Why are we so stupid? We will never be perfect on this earth, so we will continue this, even if we don't create huge obvious Consequences in the world, we will still see how we don't measure up and we will be ashamed internally.

We are constantly reminded of God's Mercy and Forgiveness- we feel delivered by him since we know that without him we are mean and deserve nothing.