Oh Me of Little Faith

Reading back through my posts so far, it strikes me that God has not given me the peace he has for me. And that may be my fault. I like everything fast and stimulating. It keeps the fear away. Fears of doom, perhaps. Fear of something I can't even name. Maybe I'm just running from letting go of myself. Running with myself away from humility.

I like my Bible and Bible study fast and stimulating too. I'd like to drink Red Bull and study the Bible. Mental activity. I am impatient for the next good thing. That seems like some form of possession. Possessed by an insecure need for worldly gratification that alleviates my fear that I am imminently doomed.

What it really comes down to is whether I believe the Bible is true. Do I believe Jesus? Do I really believe in heaven? My priorities don't demonstrate that I do. My priorities say it's all up to me. I'm not sure what is blocking me from the next step in faith.

Weird Christian Blogger Debut

Call me stupid. I'm starting another Christian blog. Stupid because this is the fourth one. I didn't keep up with the others.

Every so often I have a spiritual conviction - I am wrong, bad, a bad christian. I go back to the Bible and to journaling and praying. I have a renovation. Then I think about blogging.

Can we bring Christianity online? Christianity online is on websites that look like they're from 1995. Can't we make it cooler?